10.9 is a metric designation roughly equal to Grade 8. Both about 150,000 psi and the same hardness.
Both SAE or Metric bolts can be had with flange heads.
12.9 metric is about 175ksi and HRC 39-44 but still plenty tough.
'Harder' doesn't necessarily mean stronger. Sometimes it means very prone to pits or cracks, and snaps like glass.
But obviously fasteners need to be hard enough that threads don't turn to butter when they are torqued to create their spec clamping load.
Bill worked for decades in the test lab at Newport News.
If you're interested in superalloys I'm sure he has that information.
Jim,
Lil'Red is a '87 F250 HD, 4.10's, 1356 4x4, Zf-5, 3G, PMGR, Saginaw PS, desmogged with a Holley 80508 and Performer intake.
Too much other stuff to mention.